


Three Eggs and a Pinch of Sugar

by NeedleandChess



Category: Gravity Falls
Genre: Fluffy, I just really like human bill living with Dipper, M/M, and being, and i like to imagine them cooking together, and it not working at all, as a couple, tm - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-19
Updated: 2017-03-19
Packaged: 2018-10-07 22:54:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 291
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10371600
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NeedleandChess/pseuds/NeedleandChess
Summary: Okay but like Human!Bill Cipher and Dipper living together and making a cake.And like Bills like "THE FUCK IS A COOKBOOK LETS JUST THROW IN SIX BUTTERS"And Dipper is like "THERE IS A P R O C E D U R E!"I am amused. I am tired. Its 4am. Help me.





	

**Author's Note:**

> This is completely dialogue there is no paragrahing or proper texts because shit im tired bro someone save me from Bipper hell.

Dipper:"Where is the spoon?"  
Bill:"We don't have any"  
"How have you been following the correct measurements without a spoon?"  
"I used this spoon"  
"Bill that's a ladel"  
"Dipper that doesn't matter"  
"Right. So what are you trying to make again?"  
"A cake"  
"Do you know how to make a cake?"  
"There's milk and sugars and things"  
"So what you're saying is no?"  
"It's not hard to make a cake Dip. Look Im doing it"  
"Thats soup"  
"Its egg yolks and flour"  
"Its eggy soup"  
"If you don't appreciate the culinary arts then please leave the geniuses to it"  
"You're a genius?"  
"Ouch. I'm hurt. Ready to be microwaved"  
"Bill, a) cakes aren't microwaved and b) that's not a proper cake mix"  
"You wouldn't know proper cake mix if it hit you in the face"  
"BILL"  
"You're cuter messy. Huh. Why hasn't that cooked yet?"  
"You haven't turned it on yet"  
"Thats important?"  
"B I L L"  
"Okay fine"  
"Bill that was not an excuse to set the microwave on fire"  
"I need an excuse now?"  
"Bill the kitchen is on fire"  
"Isn't it pretty? Wow why pay for heating when we can just burn?"  
"Because people are flammable Bill"  
"Ew. People."  
"Bill please"  
"Its fine. Honestly Dipper you worry too much"  
It wasn't fine.  
In moments the house was ablaze.  
Dipper and Bill sat outside, not quite sure how they got there. Bill held Dippers hand and sat down, watching as their house glowed orange.  
"Isn't it beautiful?"  
"All our things are in there Bill!"  
"Lets get new things"  
"This is the second house"  
"Let's make it to 22"  
"Bill n-"  
"Hey Pinetree? Want some cake?"  
"I hate you"  
"Thats a funny way to love someone"  
"Shut up Cipher"


End file.
